IT TAKES A VILLAGE IDIOT:
Lessons we’ve Learned from the Clintons
by someone else – not Hillary
Here is some political satire just the way you want it - short, sweet, to the point, and cheap. (Oh, maybe that's how Bill liked it.) In any case, this book will take you back and get you ready for what’s coming in 2016. With all the talk about Hillary running for President it is fun (and a bit educational) to reminisce on the laughs and embarrassment she and her husband put us through in the 1990s. You know, the "good ole days."
This little book is not a parody of Hillary’s book, IT TAKES A VILLAGE, and the reason is simple – we don’t know anyone who read her book. This is more of a handbook for the “Nationwide Intern Program” that the Clintons wanted to force upon the country.
It’s the perfect bathroom book – only 32 pages long – but in those 32 pages you will read:
Chapter One: The First Lady – Right!
Chapter Two: The Second Lady
Chapter Three: The One after That
Chapter Four: Hillary as a Role Model
Chapter Five: The Right Wing Conspiracy
Chapter Ten: Trickle down Morality
And of course it also includes the “Nationwide Intern Program Work Application Form & Questionnaire.”
This is the book that began the Gullible Press line products and led to the parody CD, BILL CLINTON’S BIGGEST HITS . . . ON WOMEN!”
Sold in stores for $4.98 and more, you can get these collector copies for just $3 each.
BEYOND THE LAUGHTER
poems by m. agrelius
Switching gears from political satire (goofy CDs and humorous books) we transition to something a little deeper, and a little more thoughtful. This 64-page hard cover poetry
book, along with other books by m. agrelius became the best selling
poetry books (I know, could there be a better example of an oxymoron?)
for a chain of coffee house bookstores throughout California and the
Pacific Northwest. For a time they even outsold the “dead guys.”
Rather than try to hype the book. Here are a few lines from some of the poems (with the hopes you might want to read more and order the book):
Rather than try to hype the book. Here are a few lines from some of the poems (with the hopes you might want to read more and order the book):
From Laughter in the Rainbows . . .
“The flavors in the conversation taste so good to hear,
The poetry and the popcorn await your mouth and ear.
There’s dancing in the cellar and preaching in the halls,
The fire has its limits, the chimney its walls . . .”
The poetry and the popcorn await your mouth and ear.
There’s dancing in the cellar and preaching in the halls,
The fire has its limits, the chimney its walls . . .”
From She Liked . . .
“She liked salt-watered sunsets, and cold breezes that came from the sea.
She liked candy shop smells, and puppet shows that were free . . .”
She liked candy shop smells, and puppet shows that were free . . .”
From Approaching a Dream . . .
“Quietly edging up on my dream,
my goal,
my purpose.
The rest of the world continues in its own endeavors, not noticing,
and I’m kind of glad . . .”
my goal,
my purpose.
The rest of the world continues in its own endeavors, not noticing,
and I’m kind of glad . . .”
Continues to sell for $9.99 or more, you can get these books for just $5 each.
COMES A POET
poems by m. agrelius
So, if "some" is good, then "more is better," right? This is a 64-page hard cover companion to Beyond the Laughter. It’s more poetry because the first book sold so well. Here are a few lines from this volume:
From Adventurin’ . . .
“The poet sits beneath the tree, in his shorts and in the shade.
Huck Finn sits in the poet’s mind, dangling his feet in rivers of thought . . .”
Huck Finn sits in the poet’s mind, dangling his feet in rivers of thought . . .”
From Walls . . .
“You find safety in some words from a song,
you protect yourself in someone else's pain.
You put up walls to keep emotions inside,
yet you tell yourself it’s to keep others away . . .”
you protect yourself in someone else's pain.
You put up walls to keep emotions inside,
yet you tell yourself it’s to keep others away . . .”
From Time to Close Your Eyes . . .
“Have you ever been homesick for a place you’ve never been?
Have you ever thought about going there again?
Have you ever been in love with a girl you’ve never met?
Though you don’t know her, you know you can’t forget . . .”
Have you ever thought about going there again?
Have you ever been in love with a girl you’ve never met?
Though you don’t know her, you know you can’t forget . . .”
Continues to sell for $9.99 or more, you can get these books for just $5 each.
WHY WAIT ‘TIL I’M DEAD? BUY THIS BOOK NOW!
poems by m. agrelius
If some is good, more is better, and "too much" is just right. This 64-page soft cover book is full of thoughts, poems, prose and even a couple of short stories.
From the poem Discovering Age . . .
“I see the world turning old in so many new ways.
I see myself slowing down, losing hair;
but I’m just as young as ever inside my eyes . . .”
I see myself slowing down, losing hair;
but I’m just as young as ever inside my eyes . . .”
From the short story The Magic Box . . .
“He stretched forth his hand and suddenly it came alive. It asked him questions. It gave him answers. It was the perfect friend for an only child – especially one who couldn’t talk . . .”
From the poem 27th Ward . . .
“Why do lives cross and end up as part of each other?
Why are there friends so hard to let go?
Is it something we’re suppose to learn? Is it part of some plan?
When do we get to sit around in some big room with one another again? . . .”
Why are there friends so hard to let go?
Is it something we’re suppose to learn? Is it part of some plan?
When do we get to sit around in some big room with one another again? . . .”
Continues to sell for $7.99 or more, you can buy it for just $3. (Hurry, I’m getting old.)
BUY ONE, GET ONE FREE!
poems by m. agrelius and Randall D. Schultz
Okay, last poetry book . . . for now. The inspiration for this one came when Mike Agrelius shared his poem about the Challenger Space Shuttle disaster in 1988 with his friend Randy Schulz at a business lunch in Los Angeles. Randy went home that night and also wrote a poem about the crash. The next day Randy suggested, “What if we both wrote poems on a variety of topics and put them side by side in a book? It could be like buy one poet and get a second one for free.”
This 96-page soft cover book covers a range of topics including: childhood, love, God, and baseball to name a few.
On the subject of the space shuttle disaster Agrelius wrote Challenger which begins . . .
“Like it or not, there are silent prayers going on in the schools today.
There’s no loud laughter at the bars, but the whole country feels like it needs a drink.
Maybe it began to be too routine for us – life and success that is – not just the space program . . .”
There’s no loud laughter at the bars, but the whole country feels like it needs a drink.
Maybe it began to be too routine for us – life and success that is – not just the space program . . .”
In the poem, A New Challenge, Schultz began . . .
“When I was small the night sky was a huge black blanket filled with tiny pinholes
and one big bright spot called the Moon.
It was made of green cheese, then, and Mars was inhabited by red aliens
who lived in canals that dwarfed the Grand Canyon.
Back then, space was really space . . .”
and one big bright spot called the Moon.
It was made of green cheese, then, and Mars was inhabited by red aliens
who lived in canals that dwarfed the Grand Canyon.
Back then, space was really space . . .”
Continues to sell for $7.99 or more, you can buy it for just $3.
ESPECIALLY FOR ANYONE: An undistinguished anthology of thought satire
and other stuff especially suited for anyone
by Mike Agrelius, Pat Bagley, Steve Benson, Bruce Call and others
This is a good-natured spoof on stories and the culture of the LDS world from Happy Valley Publishers. There are only a few copies of this book left in print. Laugh at stories like:
Man’s Search for Sappiness
Johnny Wingo
The Touch of the Master’s Drill
Tuesday’s Soldier
They sell for significantly more on EBAY and Amazon.com. You can get them while they last for just $7 each. (Unlike other items on this site, this is especially for LDS folks, even though the title might indicate otherwise.)
THE M-DISCUSSION: A Guide to Help Returned Missionaries Find Eternal Happiness (i.e. a wife)
by m. agrelius
It was the fourth best-selling book at BYU Bookstore before it was banned back in 1978-79. They had to put a big warning on the front so missionaries at the MTC wouldn’t buy it. It is the book that launched Happy Valley Publishers and led to that company producing COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS, FOREVER FAMILIES, DO WHAT IS RIGHT, MISSIONARY BLUES, and other games and products.
More than 30,000 copies were sold back in the day, many shipped all over the world. It was called the “Mormon Pet Rock.” Now you can get it for just $2 each. This is another out of print item, so this offer is good while supplies last. (This is the other item that is for LDS customers with a sense of humor.)
